Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The stress factor

Do bear with me if I'm not linguistically up to par at the moment, because I'm on the verge of burning out. As much as I'd hate to say it, fading away is much better than burning out because at this rate I'm not about to burst into fireworks - I'm bound to explode.

Having reinforced the notion of spontaneous combustion, I shall move on to the more personal albeit dreary accounts of my life (social, academic, whatever man). So what does one have to know briefly about my current daily undertakings? I shall begin by stressing on how, uh, well, stressed I suppose, I am. I'm honestly to exhausted to come up with perfectly structured sentences with choice vocabulary, so I shall deviate from common ground and choose the most menial of methods, which is to make a list.

Yes, a list. My dear readers, do not underestimate the power of lists. They can literally make or break you, depending on the circumstances you're ensconced in, of course. In my case, lists have the propensity to remind me that I am still alive and that there is constantly something to attend to every single day and if I don't commit myself to these tasks in a timely manner I will die. Literally.

Okay perhaps not, but you get the idea.

Signs that show I am stressed : 
1. The number of times I smile in a day decreases drastically.
2. I do not stop to converse, or even bid anyone hello for that matter.
3. My voice alters to a more serious (and sometimes extremely masculine) tone. Also, this is applicable to sore throats.
4. Everyone that gets in my way is an enemy during a crucial period of time. I kid you not.
5. I constantly fidget with my laptop and type excessively speedily.
6. I do not practice tact AT ALL. Like seriously, if you're just going to poke humor into my work, just f*** off.
7. If you persist with No. 6, I will be unafraid to lash out at you. And I won't be abashed either.
8. I start questioning lecturers of the possibility of retaking a certain subject in the next semester.
9. Telling me to calm down and not give any further input usually doesn't work.
10. I zone out. Literally.
11. I talk a lot. And I mean, A LOT. Most of which is irrelevant and may sound like gibberish. 

And in the midst of all the pandemonium, there's been a series of social misfortunes that have taken place just as well. It's almost as if life took it too seriously when I muttered, "Can it get any worse?!" with regards to my busy academic life and co-curricular activities, and spontaneously threw in the severing of ties between a good friend of mine with the group he was, and I still am acquainted with. I can earnestly say that I am absolutely clueless as to how to go about with it, since this friend of mine possesses a rather immobile frame of mind and everyone else is utterly confused and somewhat appalled by his behavior, either refusing to delve into the situation or remain ignorant. I won't go further into these details since I've promised to remain discrete, but politics within a group of friends is a concept I am rather unfamiliar with, and would prefer not to tread into.

On a lighter note, the CF retreat was a rather productive and interesting endeavor. I do believe that it is safe to say that I've become quite well acquainted and comfortable with my fellow committee members, and have a clear understanding on what everyone's personalities are like, thanks to the DISC assessment. I've already known what kind of personality I had since I took the test last year during GY Camp, but taking it again this year with the committee members was a different thing altogether. I received similar results in comparison with the last test, reinforcing my key trait as a D, which stands for dominance. Strangely enough, I was the only committee member with a D characteristic in the sea of Is (inducement), Ss (submission) and Cs (compliance). As of now I will not attempt to foretell who my conflicting personalities are and refuse to put people into boxes (as tempting as it is), but I am definitely looking forward to see what God has in store for me in serving for CF (as well as see who would dare push my buttons, heh).

I guess I've come to the end of the post as there are more important things for me to attend to, although I do find ranting an effective method of stress-release. But I think I've had my share, and now I will have to move on with my life. Au revoir!

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